A pessimist's view of the tortured, wonderful, wacky life of the Wisconsin sports fan.

Mar 9

The Bizarro Bucks….

Seriously, what the hell is going on?

Not that I’m complaining, but the Milwaukee Bucks are…good! So much so that as I was listening to Ted Davis call the game as the Bucks creamed the Wizards in D.C. Friday night, I wasn’t the least bit surprised.

Normally, it’s a surprise when the Bucks win ANY road game. Now, I’m actually EXPECTING them to dominate poor teams on the road. I treated that game with a shrug of the shoulders. The fourth quarter was boring. And in a good way. In the kind of way where I don’t feel like I might suffer multiple heart attacks. Well, I did feel that way that night, but that’s only because I made the ill-fated decision to eat KFC. Brutal.

On a side note, after watching the Bucks sweep the Wizards in a home-and-home last week, I gotta feel like Wizards’ season-ticket holders are feeling pretty burned right now. Their idiot GM, Ernie Grunfeld (nice to see him making stupid decisions in other places than Milwaukee now) pays a max contract to a 0-guard who enjoys bringing guns to his own locker room. Then he trades half his roster for a nickel on the dollar. Right about now, Wizards fans are probably getting their forms to renew their season tickets for 2010 early. I’d pull a Lou Brown on that letter. You know, when Lou Brown is managing the Indians in spring training in the movie Major League and Roger Dorn presents him with a contract that says he doesn’t have to participate in groundball drills and Brown, without saying a word, unzips his pants, drops the contract on the ground and urinates on it. That’s what I would do to my season-ticket renewal form if I was a Wizards fan.

Then again, I attended a Timberwolves game in Minneapolis last weekend while visiting a buddy. In that game, their star forward Al Jefferson hogged the ball Vin Baker-style, complained to the refs, his coaches and sometimes nobody in particular when one of his ill-advised triple-pump fakes in traffic went begging then hustled back downcourt with the urgency of a Donovan McNabb two-minute drill. Oh, and later the same night Jefferson was arrested for DUI.┬áSolid night, Al. As my friend remarked, “Looks like he takes too many shots off the court, too.”

Anyway, choosing between having Timberwolves season tickets right now and Wizards season tickets would be like choosing between eating a worm or eating a centipede. Not an attractive option. The Wizards’ best player is a gun-toting lunatic, and the Timberwolves’ most exciting player hated the prospect of playing for Minnesota so much he decided to stay in Europe.

But back to the Bucks. Usually, by rule of thumb, if I don’t have anything negative to say, I don’t say anything at all. So I’ve been quietly enjoying this team. After their win over the LeBron-less Cavs Saturday and Toronto’s imcomprehensible loss to the reprehensible Sixers on Sunday, the Bucks are actually the possessors of the fifth seed in the Eastern Conference.

Repeat that sentence again. It’s early March, and everyone in Wisconsin is fired up about the Bucks. Wow.

The key, in addition to the emergence of Andrew Bogut as a dominant center, has been the acquisition of John Salmons, who has taken a ton of pressure off Brandon Jennings to score. While he struggles with his shot, Jennings can relax and be more of a facillitator while letting Salmons take on more of the outside scoring role. And if Jennings finds his shot again like he did Saturday, look out.

If I were to predict the Bucks were to make the playoffs, they wouldn’t make the playoffs. So I’m not going to say that. I’ll continue to keep my mouth shut and smile.